the best things about giving birth...

i have just recently had my fifth baby. yep, you read that right, five pregnancies, five labors, five deliveries, five hospital stays. i've given birth on both coasts and in south america. i think i'm almost an expert at this point. i'm not quite a *duggar*, but i've had my share of birthing experiences. so, here's my *letterman* top ten things about giving birth...only it ended up being 15 things...oh well.

15) losing cankles: i got to the point where i retained so much water that my feet were unrecognizable. in the hospital, i started to see the bones in my feet again. what bliss.

14) increase in bladder size: i am always amazed that as soon as that baby is out, i am able to go more than an hour in between each trip to the bathroom. it's amazing what normal bladder capacity really is...amazing!

13) you're expected to be in your pajamas...all day: there's no guilt. no one thinks you're a slob. in fact, most people will think you're an overachiever if you get *out* of your pajamas during your stay. when is that ever going to happen again? enjoy it. two to three pajama days in a row with no judgement...i'll take that!

12) meals will be brought to you in bed: again, when does this ever happen in real life? i may get a meal on a mother's day or your birthday brought up to your bed but chances are, i'll eventually get down to the kitchen where some of the mess will be waiting for me to clean up. not in the hospital. someone will bring you a hot meal, you'll get to eat it in bed and then someone will come and pick it up for you. no cleaning, no prep, just food. i don't care how bad the hospital food might be, i consider it a little gift.

11) you can request things, and someone will find a way to bring it to you: i always requested an after giving birth meal from my husband. i didn't get to eat during labor and delivery and i'm always starving. cost and inconvenience is pretty much not a factor after i've pushed a baby out. i go for it. usually when placing an order, my husband will mention that i've just had a baby. we get lots of desserts for free.

10) friends will come and hang out...and sometimes bring starbucks: when was the last time you had hours of girl time to chat? when was the last time you had more than one girlfriend come by and see you in one day? here's your chance. you can sit and chat to your heart's content. if they know you well and can bring you some liquid caffeine, all the better.

9) nurses are on call 24/7: post delivery nurses are pretty amazing. i'm pretty low maintenance with them in the hospital (again, not a novice here) but still, i know what to ask for. need to take a shower? a nurse will take your baby. need a little sleep? a nurse will take your baby. need a refill on your gigantic water bottle? a nurse will run and get that for you. they are like highly skilled and knowledgeable magic fairies.

8) gigantic water cups with straws: i don't know why i love these so much but i do. they are huge and oh so handy. if they made them so they would fit in the cup holder of my car, i'd be carrying one around everyday.

7) unlimited shower time: did i mention that a nurse will take your baby so you can shower? there is no time limit. i've never run out of hot water in the hospital. you can sit there forever. not only that, but after your shower, you have time to blow dry your hair...and put on make-up. you probably won't have that luxury for a very long time once you leave the hospital. don't miss it while you are in there. bring an extra deep conditioning treatment. exfoliate. shave both legs on the same day. go crazy.

6) internet access: most of the places where i've delivered have had wifi. this is fabulous. want to post your new baby to facebook? go for it. want to catch up on current events? it's right there. wanting to watch a show? pull it up on your laptop. again, this leisurely time is limited in the future. might as well enjoy it in the hospital.

5) catching up on all the shows you want: there is a lot of time spent lounging in the hospital. i usually hit a redbox on my way in and get a couple of movies to watch. i also pay for hulu plus for that hospital stay. all the shows you want are just a click away. when do moms ever have a chance to sit and watch tv shows? in the hospital you can watch as many as you may want...all day long.

4) napping in the middle of the day: go for it. you can nap at any time of the day and it is expected of you. there is no need to think about all of the things you could be doing while the baby is sleeping. nope, while the baby is sleeping, you get to sleep. when the doctor comes and takes the baby to check out, you get to sleep. any time of day, it doesn't matter. now that's something i could get used to.

3) taking, uploading, and sharing photos...all in one day: i hate to admit it but i've gotten worse with the photo taking with each child that has gone by. the only time this isn't the case is when i'm in the hospital. i can snap away at my little angels, load the pictures onto my computer, post them, make albums, share with my family. i'm like a picture taking guru laying in that hospital bed.

2) drugs: i take drugs. i take them during labor, they stay in there during delivery. i take some more after delivery. this last baby, i took a two hour nap while i progressed from 4-10 centimeters. thank you, drugs. thank you.

1) time to hold your baby: the number one best thing about giving birth? without a doubt, it's getting to hold my baby. at home, things pull me away from my little angel. like it or not, i have to put them down and get some stuff done. the survival of the other kids depends on it. in the hospital, i can hold my baby as long as i want. none of the other things compare.

what did i forget? how about you? what was the best thing about giving birth?

getting ready for baby: what to expect at the hospital post delivery

yeah! this is our last "getting ready for baby" post. we've made it to the end and by now, you'll have the nursery stocked, your baby gear ready to go and you'll know what will happen during labor and delivery. if you missed any of our "getting ready for baby" posts, don't miss reading those.

here's what you can expect in the hospital after your sweet, little wonder arrives.

after you deliver your baby, the nurses will eventually take the baby and clean him or her up slightly and then they will start working on cleaning you up as well. the big pads they placed under you for delivery (think bed covering pads) will be replaced. you'll be rinsed off a little bit and cleaned off with some towels. eventually you'll be put back onto another big bed pad. you'll stay on this for a while until your bleeding gets under control. they will keep replacing the bed pads for the rest of your stay.

i was informed after delivering my fourth baby that you tend to have more bleeding after each delivery. for my fourth, i was told that i wasn't at the point of needing a blood transfusion but that i was close. this isn't just period bleeding...this is something much more. think crime scene photos. be prepared.

eventually you'll try to get to the bathroom again on your own. each time you go to the bathroom, you'll have a little plastic bottle to fill with warm water. you'll need to rinse yourself well after each trip to the potty. they'll then give you some super attractive disposable underwear and some monster sized pads that you'll wear and replace many times in those first hours after delivery. if you need more, ask for them. don't be afraid to use the towels to clean yourself off. this is labor and delivery. they are used to a mess. don't worry about the white towels that are sitting in the bathroom. just use them.

they'll also provide some ice packs for your va-jay-jay. these don't make your feel 100% but they do help you feel better. use them and ask for more. they are a small relief after labor and delivery and you'll be glad you have them. if they don't offer them right away, ask if you can get some.

after a short time, you'll have a lactation consultant come in to visit. if you thought your privacy was invaded during labor and delivery, just wait for this fun. these lovely ladies will come in and grab your boob with a vice grip and shove it into your baby's mouth. if the baby doesn't do it right, they'll move the baby off and try again. this will happen repeatedly during your hospital stay. good times. don't forget your lanolin at this point. it will save your boobies.

your baby will be in and out of your room at this point. they'll be taken and bathed. the pediatrician will check on the baby either in your room or in another location. there will be blood tests done on your baby through a little slice on their heel. the baby will be poked and proded during their hospital stay. they will love calm moments with you so enjoy those. when the baby is away, take advantage of that time to take care of yourself.

if the baby is out of the room, this is the perfect opportunity to use the bathroom, change your clothes, if possible, take a shower. use those moments to clean up a bit and to feel a bit more refreshed. little luxuries make a huge difference during your hospital stay.

you'll be offered pain medication during this time as well. if you need something stronger, don't be afraid to ask. if you are exhausted, don't feel bad about asking a nurse to take your baby to the nursery for an hour so you can take a nap. the nurses are trained to take care of your baby. you'll be on call 24/7 as soon as you walk out of those hospital doors. if you can get an hour of sleep in a the hospital, take it. nurses will be in and out all night long, your baby will need to eat every couple of hours all night long, hospitals are never particularly quiet. if you can get a moment of rest, don't feel guilty, take advantage.

on your last day, several things will need to happen. your baby will need a final check with the pediatrician, you'll need a final check with the ob/gyn, discharge papers will need to be completed, forms signed and your iv removed. the day you leave is always packed full of activities. be prepared for a busy last several hours there. finally, your baby will be released to you and you'll be wheeled out of the labor and delivery ward. this was always my favorite part of the process...the moment when it was all over. have your camera ready. take pictures and try to savor the little moments before you head home. your life will never be the same. try to absorb as much of it all as you can.

there are so many details of each person's experience. you'll have plenty of stories of your own. each baby brings its own excitements and hilarious moments. try to see them as hilarious intead of mortifying. they will all be worth the prize...a beautiful baby of your own. do your best to enjoy.